This weekend is father's day, so no prizes for guessing what the topic this post would be about.... 

My father has always been known for being a solemn man. Yes, my mom, my siblings would know- he has his moments; when he breaks into generous laughter; when he makes a funny facing, knowing how silly a joke he's making; when he pesters my mother like a child; but for the most part, he is a solemn man.

A feisty one myself, we clashed several times during the course of my adolescence-
My father, brought up in a conservative, traditional chinese family, expected his children to be obedient and to always respect elders- and to give in, even if, in some cases, the request/view point of elders (himself included) isn't reasonable or doesn't make sense.

Myself, on the other hand, though growing up under my father (and mom)'s teaching and care, am a radically different kind of person. I remember thinking (at a woefully young age) that things in the world should be made equal, and that all things should be just and fair. Reason was my sole direction. And if I felt I was right, I wouldn't give in to anything, or anyone.

Growing up, both of us softened down. In the recent years I dare say our relationship has become somewhat of a soft, fluffy compromise (if you can describe it that way) on both sides- My father tolerating my lack of patience and blunt outbursts, and me tolerating his; it has become a kind of old fondness- that comes with time and sensibility gained with age.

Perhaps it is because of the passing of the parents/elders of my friends/those around me that sometimes I worry- I worry that there won't be many years left for us to quarrel.

It's only in recent years that this dawned upon me-

sometimes it doesn't matter who's right or wrong, reasonable or not;
what matters is compromise- because only with compromise can people live a happy life together.

Happy father's day to all dads out there in the world- it's not a easy thing to do, deciding to be one, but hey. you've done a great thing ;)

and to all sons and daughters, cherish your dad.